Tuesday, February 4, 2014

2/4/14

Well, it seems I'm having problems consistently remembering to post. But I'm going to improve in my efforts.

Today, I want to think about what I fear. I've been struggling with why I don't have joy in my life.  Why am I a pessimist?
I think I've always been a pessimist. I've always allowed fear to rule my life. But now it's fear of the future.  What happens when our culture no longer accepts my evangelical beliefs.  what happens when I have to suffer for my faith. I'm a doom and gloom kind of guy, so I see it just around the corner.  And indeed it might be closer than anyone thinks.
but even if it is, why shouldn't I be joyous about what God is doing? The early Christians were in a much more difficult position than I am in, and they were filled with joy. is it because I don't have faith in Jesus? Perhaps. But perhaps, I expect life to be sunshine and lollypops all the time. Perhaps, I'm angry because I don't think God is living up to his end of the bargain.
perhaps I need to let go of some things.
Anger- over the last couple of years at church.
Fear- We don't know what the future holds, so worrying about it just doesn't make sense.
Disappointment- I thought I'd be further along in my career by now

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